Review: "Birdemic 2: The Resurrection"

There’s something charming about certain kinds of “bad” movies. For me, I can say that they remind me of my middle school days, when I’d run around the neighborhood, making short films on my palmcorder and S-VHS camera. I cringe whenever I view this old footage - it is just horrible. However, there is an earnestness that comes through clearly; a wanting to make a movie because you love movies, skills be damned.

Birdemic: Shock and Terror was made and put out into the world with the kind of passion that some mainstream directors lack. Through word of mouth, midnight screenings and an excellent Rifftrax commentary, the movie became a cult success. And, like with most successful films, plans for a sequel came out.

Would the same charm that people loved carry over?

Made with a sense of self awareness, Birdemic 2: The Resurrection is exactly the kind of sequel I was expecting. Set in Hollywood - a few years after the events of the original - we almost get the same exact structure: A man and woman fall in love and enjoy great career success along the way. This time, the man is a filmmaker and the woman a struggling actress. Rod (the previous lead) returns, with girlfriend Natalie, to be a financial backer of his friends movie. But, when blood rains from the heavens, birds rise from the tar pits to attack humanity!

Like before, there are no character arcs, no twists, and no real explanation for anything happening. Permission may have been given to shoot in and around better locations and all, but it’s almost the same exact movie. Seriously. The opening, the restaurant scene, the girl getting a gig, the guy getting money, the dancing, the hotel, etc.

Why mess with what worked before, the director must’ve stated.

And if he said that, he’s right. The fans that came out in droves for the original are responsible for the sequel even being made. Knowing what they liked before, director James Nguyen delivers everything with a wink, a smile and a thank you. One line of dialogue in particular, delivered by the boy Rod and Natalie saved in the original, has me convinced of the jokey nature of the production: “I wish my sister were here to see this; she died after eating the fish Rod made.”

Combined with the callbacks and references, this is ultimate fan service. I can’t say that I connected with this the same way I did with the original, but that’s ok. Birdemic 2: The Resurrection is a loving sentiment to a devoted audience. Nguyen may not be good at making movies, but he’s good at showing that he loves movies. A scene where a moviegoing crowd is attacked by birds was shot with real fans in a real theater. I flashbacked to Gremlins 2 at that moment, and remarked to myself how much fun they were all having.

Has the charm returned? Well... it’s more like a twinkle.

All over again, I found myself cringing at the bad line reads and poor edits and shots. But, if I had made this movie as a wide eyed middle schooler, I would be very proud of myself, and look back on that time with fondness. It’s still bad, though.

1/5 *s

Birdemic 2: The Resurrection is coming to NOLA’s Prytania Theatre on April 20th at 10PM, with a special Q&A afterwards. Be there, or download the movie from Chill.com!

Review: "House of Bad"

Just the other day, the good folks at MovieBoozer setup a debate between myself and fellow reviewer Mitch Hansch over the movie Olympus Has Fallen. Despite some problems with the format, we came to a mutual understanding for each others opinions. When the recording was over, however, I couldn’t help but wonder; are all opinions on movies created equal?

Far be it for me to deny another critic their right to review, or for an audience member to express themselves, but some ratings just confuse me. How can someone rate 2001: A Space Odyssey six beers or The Happening thumbs up? Sometimes, a movie can generate opinions from both sides of the spectrum, and that’s fine. But sometimes, there just is no valid opposing view.

For House of Bad, there can be only one grade - poor.

And I really hate that I typed that, but it’s just true. The movie is about three half sisters (though maybe only one of them is half?) who have just robbed a drug dealer of his stash, and hide out in the most secure and off the grid place they can think of; their old childhood home. They figure they’ll hide out for two weeks, then skip town (even though skipping town first might’ve saved them some trouble). The big sis takes full control, the one confirmed half sis struggles with drug withdrawals and the middle sis tries to hold it all together. But the dark history of the house may be too much for them to handle…

…or for the director. Overacting, over expository and redundant dialogue, bad editing and confusing story moments all make for something unintentionally funny. Horror films are known for a level of campiness and fun, but this was going for a more dramatic thriller theme. Unfortunately, it approaches its theme with the skill level of a bad late night cable softcore porno. At one point, the big sis is standing alone in a room, naked, bathed in moonlight, with a gun to her head. She goes on and on about how her life got so messed up, before a vision of her evil father appears. Continuing to monologue, she stares out the window, with an eye twitching like a mad scientist in an insane asylum. I laughed hard, knowing that I probably was supposed to feel unnerved.

There is another scene where the man they stole the drugs from shows up at the house, and ties the girls up. He drones on and on, over using the f word and repeating himself (possibly bad improv to fill in the blanks of the scene?) before finally getting stabbed on a bad edit, and then shot in the head with a dot of paint with bad squib exploding from behind his head. When you have made me laugh more than a schlock horror flick like The Granny, and your tone is that of a supernatural thriller… As Alfred said to Bruce Wayne, “Know your limits”.

I’ve read quotes from reviews that have been promoted on the films’ facebook page. They say it’s one of the best new horror films, it’s an example of great independent cinema, etc. With no level of arrogance or doubt, I can say that these reviewers either A) weren’t watching the movie I watched B) didn’t watch the movie at all C) were way too kind or D) were influenced by some demonic being. Filmmaker Jim Towns is a wonderfully nice guy, and I genuinely look forward to his next project, but House of Bad is just not good. No other opinion fits.

1/5 *s